An Interview with Thomas

Thomas Mustacchia, 21, is an affectionate son, a younger brother, and a role model for his nephew. He is a high school graduate and is a current employee of the Department of Transportation. Thomas loves to partake in outdoor activities like hiking, going to the beach, and taking spontaneous road trips throughout the New Jersey and Pennsylvania regions in his 2015 Volkswagen Jetta. Residing in Staten Island, New York, Thomas lives with his mother, Fran, in a two family house. Upstairs lives his sister, Jessica, his brother-in-law, Jorge, and 1 and ½ year old nephew, Peter. Thomas has lived on the South side of Staten Island his whole life. However, there was one particular year where he didn’t live in his familiar home. Although it may seem like he has it all: a successful career, devoted friends and family, and a place to call home, Thomas hasn’t always taken advantage of this picturesque lifestyle. Life hasn’t always been easy for the twenty-one year old.  There was once a time in his life where he questioned whether or not he would even be alive to see his 21^st birthday. 

Sitting at his oval dinner table I am greeted by Tom along with his nephew Peter, screaming and crying and clinging onto his uncle. As he sits down to talk with me, a scent of cigarettes and Hermes cologne engulfs me. He is indisputably charming, standing at 5’6” with thick black hair, enticing dark brown eyes and a statuesque build. He’s wearing a $15 shirt from H&M with long sleeves, which he begins to roll up as he sits down and places his nephew on his lap. As he let’s out a sigh following with a charming smile, he says, “Let’s get started,” and we begin the interview.

Q: So Thomas, to begin, what would you say are some of the best memories you can remember from any point in your life?

A: Just simply being on my old block in my neighborhood I used to live in with nothing but the whole summer ahead of me and every night to stay out and just be kids.

Q: I can say the same for myself. Can you tell me about a hardship that you’ve faced in your life?

A: Once I moved I got into substance abuse while I was twelve years old. It took me until I was seventeen to enter a therapeutic community in upstate New York that would last a little over three years, but had different parts of the program. Throughout that time I remained sober.

Q: Was there anything specific that caused you to fall into substance use?

A: I had a lot of issues growing up. Most of them were normal problems that a lot of kids feel but that’s just the way I handled them. I ended up dependent on heroine and painkillers, different hallucinogens and other control substances. I knew I needed to do something or really suffer for the rest of my short life or just die.

Q: As for the people you hung out with during this period in your life, the people you did the drugs with, do you still remain in contact with them? What’s your relationship like with them today?

A: Some actually ended up in the program so I still have contact with them. Some were in the program and left before they completed so I haven’t spoken to them and some didn’t really get any help at all and still struggle. I have spoken to them through Facebook but keep it at that and some I just don’t speak with simply because I don’t want to, even if they’re clean.

Q: So what is this program that you mentioned? Can you talk a little bit about it for those who aren’t familiar with situations like this?

A: It’s a three-year therapeutic community called Dynamite Youth Center that has different steps. The first step is one year long and you all live together upstate with staff that also live in a house on the grounds that guide you through it. After one year you transfer down to a Brooklyn house and the first step there is six months back and forth with no job. The second phase in Brooklyn is three days a week and you work part time at your job in between. The third is full time work and going to the Brooklyn house on Friday’s. We have groups and different meetings. We had a lot of fun too. We would have New Years parties together and for all the holidays we would have parties and have full basketball and football and baseball games, watch movies on a projector screen with all eighty-five people in the house in the gym with blankets on the floor and pillows… it was like a huge family. We ate our meals together, wash our dishes together, clean our house and rooms. We held our functions on the grounds. Some people cut grass… did maintenance… took care of the pool…paper work…cooked…there as different levels of workers. I ran the maintenance crew and we built a dorm from the ground up.

Q: And what is the range of ages of the members?

A: Anywhere from thirteen to twenty-five. Usually sixteen to twenty-one.

Q: How old were you when you entered Dynamite? Do you remember the day that you decided you needed help?

A: I was seventeen and I was at my sister’s wedding and I was really drunk and I ended up telling one of my cousins I was shooting heroine so within a week I was upstate.

Q: Are there certain rules you have to follow if you enter Dynamite?

A: So many. It’s strict but it was also really fun at the same time. So many rules I don’t even want to name them all, but it went as far as you have to wait three months to touch the remote control without permission.

Q: Are you finished with the program? Do you still remain in contact with the people at Dynamite?

A: Yeah I stop by every now and then. I should probably go more often. They offer a group once a month for people who complete the program.

Q: During your time, did you ever wish you could leave?

A: Yeah, plenty of times…but after a couple of months, I grew a good connection with the place and couldn’t bring myself to leave.

Q: How different is your life now from when you first started off at Dynamite?

A: It’s a completely different thing in a lot of ways. I hold more responsibilities now, I have a girlfriend…I have a nephew. My dad passed away while I was in the program and even my best friend died a couple of weeks ago from relapse. I just became more responsible and able to function in the world and be way more trust worthy and hold up morals and values and have future goals.

Q: Is there one thing that you’ve learned in Dynamite that helps you everyday?

A: To just continue to be me and learn from it.

Q: And is there anything that you’ve learned that you would give as advice to a new Dynamite member?

A: You can really only give so much… you don’t want their head to explode. I guess I would say take it day by day and do less talking, because you don’t even really know what you’re talking about.

Q: That seems like it would be helpful. Finally, I know sometimes you probably feel like people judge you based on this past experience. Is there anything you would like people from outside of the spectrum to know?

A: I don’t feel judged about that at all. There’s no one in this world who doesn’t have some sort of problem. If you want to be a judge then go to school.

Q: Great advice, thank you Thomas.